The complete guide
10 tips for your first ecstatic dance
Everything we'd tell a friend before their first dance, in one place.
1
If you move to music, you can dance
There are no steps to learn, no partner needed and no way you're supposed to look. Ecstatic dance is about what you're feeling and how your body wants to move.
Start small. Sway, stretch or walk around the room, and let the music do the work.
“If you move when you listen to music, you can dance. Ecstatic dance isn't about steps or partners. It's about what you're feeling, how your body wants to move, and sharing that energy in community.”
2
Let the first few songs feel awkward
Nearly everyone feels self-conscious at the start. That's normal, and it usually passes by the second or third song.
If you've ever moved around your kitchen with headphones on, you already know how to do this.
“I truly felt free to move however I wanted to move. I didn't move much differently from the way I do by myself at home.”
3
Nobody is looking at you
It's easy to worry you look silly. Nobody is judging you, and most people have their eyes closed or are lost in their own dance. It doesn't matter whether you hit the beat or how tall, short, big or small you are.
There's no talking and no phones on the dance floor, so you don't have to perform for anyone.
“Nobody is looking at you. You may think you look silly, but nobody cares. If you're out there having fun, that's it. That's all there is to it.”
4
Be who you want to be
There's no right way to do this. Some people close their eyes, some smile and interact, and some just move in circles. All of it belongs.
If you'd like to dance with someone, make eye contact and wait for a clear yes. If you'd rather not, a turn away or prayer hands is a complete answer.
“You can be who you want to be. Some people close their eyes. Some people smile and interact. Some people just move in circles. Everything is okay.”
5
Move at your own pace, and rest whenever you want
You set your own intensity, song by song. You can dance hard, move gently, sit at the edge of the room or lie on the floor for a whole song. Nobody is keeping score.
Stepping out for water or a breather is completely fine. Come back to the floor when you're ready.
“Dancing and being a part of such a nonjudgmental community really helps to ground and remember I am human first and foremost.”
6
Follow whatever moves you in the music
The music usually starts slow and grounded, builds and then eases back down. You don't need to keep up with it.
Listen for one thing that catches you, like a beat, a melody or a feeling, and let that lead.
“For me, the best music has emotional content. It might be the beat, a violin, a rhythm, or a feeling. Ecstatic dance is about connecting to whatever moves you.”
7
Wear something you can move in
Leggings and a t-shirt, sweatpants, a flowy skirt or something sparkly all work. Dressing up is welcome, and so is rolling out of bed.
Most people dance barefoot or in socks. Clean, soft-soled indoor shoes are fine too, especially if you need them.
8
Bring water and a layer
A water bottle is the one thing you really need. Your temperature changes a lot through the dance, so layers help, and a small towel is handy if you run warm.
Leave your phone in your bag so you can be fully in the room.
9
Arrive a little early for the opening circle
The opening circle helps you settle in. It's a few words of welcome, the ground rules and a minute of breathing together.
Arriving a few minutes early gives you time to take off your shoes, find a spot and land before the music starts.
10
Stay for tea
On the floor you're dancing on your own, but you're also sharing energy with everyone in the room.
After the dance there's tea and conversation, and that's usually where friendships start. Stay for tea as long as you like.
“The opening meditation grounded my intentions for the dance, the sound bath helped integrate the experience and the tea offering at the conclusion helped to foster meaningful connection.”